Sopor Aeternus: Have You Seen This Ghost? (2011)

One Day My Prince Will Come

I know one Day my Prince will come,
no need for him to be well hung:
He will have other Qualities,
some of which you have ... never seen ...before.
I struggled in my girlish mind
trying so hard to dream up my only Mister Right...
...But not a single vision ever came to me...-
such is the Love that is not meant to be...

Oh, illusive, Amphibian,
in on a poisonous scheme,
in his inditrious house
dwells the old Sham of a Beast;
beware, the walls are made of glass...
yes, all here imitates Life,
and the Symptoms of your Sadness
are the Key to this place...

There are two precious holes left in the transparent lif,
once, in a gesture of Hope, glued to the Barrel's sharpest Edge;
the larger one of the Tunnles allows the channeled Waters to flow,
because the other One's the Exit Door where the air comes and goes...

The Bubbles of the spectacle
unfold their Magic(k), obscene,
the offered rivers all turn lethal
as the large Frog disappears, through Veils of sickest Transformation,
the oldest of all gestures is born;
a Miniature of a Prince appears and He is dancing on the Crystal floor...

It is imperative now
to empty your bladder and your bowls,
in only 3 glorious Days the Prince, he stretcyes & GROWS,
all to It s pre-destined size, bearing Love's promise of Life;
through the disease of a toy we face our secret Desire.

I know... one day my prince will come,
no need for him to be well hung,
He will have other Qualities,
a whole Bouguet of Flowers yet unseen before.
I struggled in my girlish mind
trying... oh,so hard... to dream up my own Mister Right...
But not a single vision ever came to me...
as I was polishing the armoury.

Gone is the fragile Beauty the good Fairies have called,
once the tide of the fourth day washes over shores,
grown into oddless angler, all distorted & wrong,
so grotesque beyond comprehension,
a royal Dick tries to come...


Cornuscopia d'Amour

I do not eat because I'm hungry,
though... this sometimes happens too,
I only eat because I'm lonely
and I got nothing else to do.

I recently discovered it's the perfect Way to pass the Time,
I'm wolbing down all kinds of Shit,
to fill the Emptiness inside.

I tend to live on Chocolate now, for Reasons I mentioned above,
the Fridge's become my new best friend, and Food...
my substitute for Love.

I do not really go for Taste,
there's no such thing as 'good or bad',
I get no joy from eating food 'cause all things taste the same...- I'm fat.

I've banned all Mirrors from my home,
I cannot bear them judging me,
I feel... I'm gaining weight each day.
I hate myself enough for three.
I do not eat because I'm hungry,
well, yes... that sometimes happens too,
I mostly eat because I am alone,
and I've got nothing else...to do.


It Is Safe To Sleep Alone

It is safe to sleep alone
In a place no one knows
And to seek life under stones
In a place water flows.

It is best to find in sleep
The missing pieces that you lost
Best that you refuse to weep
Ash to ash, dust to dust.

It is strange to sleep alone
In a place no one knows
Strange to shelter under stones
In a place water flows.

It is safe to walk with me
Where you can read the sky and stars,
Safe to walk upon the sea
In my sleep we can go far.

It is safe to sleep alone
In a place no one knows
And to shelter under stones
In a place water flows.

It is strange to sleep alone
In a place no one goes,
Strange to seek life under stones.
In my sleep no one knows.


Hello

I've been alone with him inside my mind
And in my dreams He kissed my lips a thousand times
I sometimes see him pass outside my door

Hello, is it me you're looking for?
I can't see it in your eyes
I can't see it in your smile
He's all I've ever wanted, (and) my arms are open wide
'Cause he know just what to say
And he know just what to do
And I want to tell him so much, I ...

I long to see the sunlight in his hair
And he will tell time and time again how much he care
Sometimes I feel my heart will overflow

Hello, I've just got to let him know:
'Cause I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying, I ...

Hello, it's not me you're looking for
Though I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying ... I ...


At The Stroke Of Midnight Gently

If the face of Love is like that of a clock,
then its little Hand is represented by a Cock.
At the stroke of midnight then,
if you catch my drift,
he arrived at the fabulous Cruising-ground,
'cause one of the guys... well... he gave him a Lift.
Scott, my goodness, in fishnet, is such a Heart-warming sight:
A Butch Queen walks for the first time in drag tonight.
He's like a new-born child, despite the ancient Ghosts in Tow.
Oh, blessed be the wonders that a wig and Eye-Shadow can do...

If the face of Love is like that of a Clock,
then it's (hopefully medium-size) little Hand...- Eh, been there: it's a COCK!!!
Gently comes the Midnight stroke, sometimes given, sometimes bought.
The saddest thing of all the lot is that fleeting Ghost of Lust...


Starlight Seen Through Veils Of Tears

Is it a Belly of Muscles I see shaping underneath that turtleneck?
I never ever dreamt having the rusty trunk of a car against my Backside...
That's poison for my piles, the street is glimmering, 'cause it had rained all night.
Please, do not think that I don't appreciate your generous Offer of a Ride... home.

I am curious now, how many pirouettes can a straight Man like you spin,
until his Compass-points all begin to blur, and his Needle finally gives in?
Am I expected now to do my best and try to catch you when you fall?
But you're a heavy Guy and like this we'll only end up lying on the floor.

Look, what the Rain has done,
snow-white has scattered her Mirrors like petals on the Ground.
So I sense a one-eyed Serpend
rising slowly now from behind this old thundering Cloud?
Was it a trick of the Evening-star,
or had I been blinded by the passing lights,
Could it be that I really saw myself reflected in his green-grey Eyes?

It's hard to waltz precissely when his towering stature casts its Shadow all over me.
But since he's leading now (anyway), I might just as well step onto his feet...


Powder

I once made a Confession, it won't happen again,
I've killed all my Desires after that fateful Day...

I once had an Erection, well... sort of... at the Age of Five,
we fumbled in the Bushes, Yes, we made out in broad daylight.

Not sandbox, slide or jungle-gym,
entertained a different whim:
our groins playfully occupied...
it was our first and only time.

Because I failed to take into account
that my Sickness would be spread around:
All the Parents gave advice to shun
that dirty little Fairy who was out to stain their precious sons...

Sometimes, in those lonely Hours,
I can hear His voice in my Head,
the most erotic Promise that a Man has ever made:
"If you were a landscape Love,
a kingdom I came passing through,
I'd stop and reach down for my Penis and urinate all over You."

I once had an Aquaintance too,
who liked to wrestle me (me me),
he'd put me in a Headlock or he'd simply sit on Top of me.
One sunny day then I found out
that touching me got him aroused,
which gave a whole new meaning to
the Squats our Gym-coatch made us do...

... Where he had to sit on my Shoulders all Sweat & sighs,
my Head embedded firmly between his strong warm Thighs.
Perhaps all this got me somewhat predisposed...
... for butch guys, Bears and things you're not supposed to do...

Sometimes, in those lonely Hours,
I can hear His voice in my Head,
the most erotic Promise that a Man has ever made:
"If you were a landscape Love,
a kingdom I came passing through,
I'd stop and reach down for my Penis and urinate all over You."


Angel Of The Golden Fountain

Fühl ich mich einsam und allein,
nehm' ich ein Glas und Pinkel hinein,
und führ ich es dann zu meinen Lippen hin,
weiss ich, dass ich niemals alleine bin.

Schönheit kommt wahrlich stets den Innen her,
darum in ein Glas ich meine Blase entteer,
und ist mein Goschpreide auch dem Silber angetraut,
so spür ich dies Gold doch so gern auf meiner Haut...

Merkt auf, ich bin reich, eife Teen-Königin,
treg' ich doch einen unermesslichen Schatz in mir drein;
oft taugleich om Morgen Sabsal abendspät,
ja, Töpfchen für Töpfchen in their alles Qualität!!!

Ach, fühl' ich mich mal einsam und ganz fürchterlich allein,
ja, dann nehm ich mir ein Glas und pinkel flugs hinein,
und führ ich es dann noch huldvoll zu den Lippen hin,
ja, dann weiss ich ganz genau, dass ich nie allein bin.

Birdeilen bein steinfarben und dann wieder kristallklar,
ach, mein himmlischer Urin ist mir Ambrosia,
funkelnd wie ein Wunderwerk im ersten Sonnenlicht,
sein warmer Glanz, ein Engelschauch, auf Kurpark Gesicht.

Sieh, mein kugekybder Wattebausch, wie et flauschig weich in das Perdenreich traucht;
und herst Du den Sauber zu nächtlicher Stund sind Wunden bald fort, und Du fühlt Dick gesund.
Fühl ich mich mal einsam und allein, dann nehm ich mir ein Glas und Pinkel hinein,
und führ ich es dann zu meinen Lippen hin, denn weiss ich, dass ich niemals alleine bin.


Where The Ancient Laurel Grows

I wish that he and I at least once in a While
had something small in common ...- a secret, if you like.
But there's no common ground here, not a single thing we share,
on the same Planet we live, but in two different Worlds.

He clearly did not like me,
that part was plain to see,
the very moment that he laid his grey Eyes on me,
His buff, muscular body
like the old cliché Marine,
Oh, not too many times before
(thank goodness) have I seen...

So much contemp on a single white Man's face,
his Fists were cluteched so tightly that his brute fingernails
left bleeding Marks in the rouch palms on his Hands...-
all just to ensure that we would never become friends!

If I felt like jesting now,
which, believe me, I am not,
I might compare his red face to a boiling teapot,
or an old Locomotive,
far too quickly building up steam,
its mightly Kettle seen to expolode, if he finds no quick Release.

Do you think it's strange of me to hope someday he will marry me,
or at least feel the strongest need to hold me when I fall & bleed?
Oh, I wish that he and I were just a little more alike,
or had a tiny Thing in common ...- oh, wouldn't that be nice...

Yes, he sleeps nakedly, while I always sleep fully dressed.
He is full of Life, I am mostly depressed.
I guess, that's why I wish that he would want to take a walk with me
through lonely Fields of Sorrow, the only place I've ever seen...

In vagued Daydreams I'm dreaming about Stains of his Semen,
put precisely on me, more as a ... "theory".
Sometimes I wish that He would fondly think of me
each time he strokes his Penis...- or when the Clock strickes Three.


I Fell For One Who Loves Me Not

I fell for one who loved me not,
the same old Lines
was really all that he had got;
then my Illusions, one by one,
they quickly fell apart...-
Not a single of these Things
took any effort on his Part.

Believe me when I say that all Actors are Whores,
I got this on the best Authority.
Believe me when I tell you all Actors are Whores.
Especially the male Variety!!!


Holding Out For A Hero

Where have all the good men gone
And where are all the gods?
Where's the street-wise Hercules
To fight the rising odds?
Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?
Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need

I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light
He's gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And he's gotta be larger than life

Somewhere after midnight
In my wildest fantasies
Somewhere just beyond my reach
There's someone reaching back for me
Racing on the thunder end rising with the heat
It's gonna take a superman to sweep me off my feet

Up where the mountains meet the heavens above
Out where the lightning splits the sea
I would swear that there's someone somewhere
Watching me

Through the wind end the chill and the rain
And the storm and the flood
I can feel his approach
Like the fire in my blood

Where have all the good men gone
And where are all the gods?
Where's the street-wise Hercules
To fight the rising odds?
Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?
Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream
of what I need

I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero, you know, 'til the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light
He's gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And he's gotta be larger... larger than life


The Hours Of Sadness

Comes the golden Light of the Dogday afternoon...
waiting for the sacred Hour when he comes to my Room.
He brings me Flowers beautiful, he's been doing that for Years,
and photographic Memories, Trophies of his... Victories...

... Vouchers of Conquests, boldly flagged, streaming high... on Mass of Battle-ships,
sailing on the troubled Seas, Waters of dull Aquaintances,
spread out on the Blackness here of this shroud-like tablecloth crocheted...-
glossy Evidance of Lust, of all the handsome Men he had.

Like an Assassin's Game of Cards,
unshuffled Oracle of Love,
of one Nightstands, half hearted Loss,
stolen Kisses, past Jerk-offs.

Liassons that went nowhere,
fleeting Moments, without Hope or Care,
all laid out now before me here
between Dessert Plates & cups of Tea.

I feel for him
as I feel for no other Man,
but Sadness is the only Thing
that he and I will ever share...

Each Polaroid, it bears a young,
but slightly out-of-focus Face,
white Teeth exposed in Flashlight-smiles,
well-defined Bodies, strong & tanned...

Names & Numbers, Cyphers traced
like Promises upon each Frame,
according to the features shown;
sadly, all poses look the same.

I hardly speak, I rarely do,
my role is just to sit & listen
to the Tales he unfolds, offers to me,
his palest "Hunt of Agony"...

...the sexless priest,
the joyless Clown,
who never judges, only frowns,
Sipping tea & offering Chocolate Cake,
for it does concole the Heart that lies in Ache.

The fading portraits on my walls,
dead people I have never met,
unlike his photos, Trophies all,
decount to Lovers, Men he had...

I feel for him
as I feel for no other Man,
but Sadness is the only Thing
that he and I will ever share...